listening to you spit out those disgusting words, makes me angry.

watching you claw at life, trying to find a way to help yourself back up, makes me sick.

hearing you lie about real life situations to everyone who doesn't matter, is enough to make me want to stab you.

but then i realize that you're me. that we are the same.

that if i told everyone my disgusting words, they would get angry.

if i showed how i was clawing at life too, people would be sickened.

if the people who didn't matter thought i was lying about my real life situations, they would want to stab me.

i told momma about how you made me feel, and she said to write it down.

i told my boy about how you made me feel, and he said to bask in it and learn from it.

i told myself how you made me feel, and i realized i wasn't feeling anything at all.

and maybe that was the problem all along.

and now i just want to thank you.

and now i just want to hug you.